Why Children Need More Freedom

"Keep in mind that it is only when you feel you have the legitimate right to say no that you can say yes with utmost certainty, sincerity, and enthusiasm." taken from Today's Daily Om, "Finding Freedom in NO" (read all of it here)

Wise Reflections from Wild and Precious Ren

I just had to share this wonderful post from fellow unschooler, Ren.

Wild and precious....
A one-way ticket to the grave. That's what we all have. I wrote about it at one of my unschooling lists and then the thought really settled in. Parents of younger children often worry about college, worry about what their children are learning, worry, worry. I understand those heartstrings being pulled so tight you want everything to be perfect for your child. I do.

But I no longer relate to the worry. I no longer understand why college matters so much to some people or judging someone on the kind of job they choose to hold. I don't care if my child makes good money or chooses to drive or not. We've got a one-way pass to the grave people. A pass that can be re-called at any time. In the words of Mary Oliver; "Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?

(Continue reading at Tea with Ren)

Open the Door to Joy in 2009!

THE DAILY GROOVE ~ by Scott Noelle
www.enjoyparenting.com/dailygroove



:: Is Joy Knocking On Your Door? ::



She knocked on the huge palace door. The peepholecover slid open, revealing the grim face of thepalace guard. "Who goes there?"



"I am Joy," she answered with a smile, "I'm here tovisit the Queen."



The guard shut the peephole abruptly. A few minuteslater, it slid open again and the guard said, "TheQueen is upset because her children are misbehaving.You may not enter until conditions improve."



"But I bring good tidings, and if she would let mein, the children would surely abandon their mischief."



"Sorry," the guard grumbled, "I must do HerMajesty's bidding." Then he locked the door and left.



But Joy did not leave . . . She just kept knocking.



Today, if you feel upset for any reason, askyourself this: "Am I using these conditions as anexcuse to disallow my natural state of well-being?"
Decide that when JOY knocks on *your* door,you'll let it in... no matter what the conditions!



http://dailygroove.net/unconditional-joy
--> Get "The Daily Groove" book! http://www.enjoyparenting.com/book
Feel free to forward this message to your friends!(Please include this paragraph and everything above.)Copyright (c) 2008 by Scott Noelle

For Me & My Freaky Friends

Do not fear to be eccentric in opinion, for every opinion now accepted was once eccentric.
Bertrand Russell

Things Are Looking Up

If you want good news for a change, my friend Gerri makes it very easy for you. All you have to do is view her Good News Network. It's all good, all the time! Gerri has been at this for 11 years now, and her commitment to focusing on the positive is stronger than ever. Just recently Gerri and her network were featured on a television show called American Crossroads. I highly recommend viewing the show, and also getting your "daily dose of news to enthuse" as Gerri says!

Goodbye 2007 and Hello 2008!

The photo above was (as you can see by the stupid date stamp that I keep forgetting to turn off) the final sunset of 2007, as viewed from my front yard. What a beautiful good-bye for the year!

I wish everyone a New Year even more beautiful than the last. I hope that we all keep our eyes open to the beauty of life that surrounds us all, and share our joy to keep the beauty growing. I am confident that we can make this world an even better place than it already is.

You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, "Why not?" -- George Bernard Shaw, "Back to Methuselah" (1921), part 1, act 1

An Early Christmas Present to Myself

On Saturday December 22nd, in the middle of the all the holiday hooplah, I escaped to Exodus Coffee & Culture to see the wonderful, amazing, talented Amy Steinberg. If you haven't heard Amy sing, you are really missing out! Seeing Amy perform live is even more of a gift. Amy is as real as they come. She knows how to connect with her audience and gives all of herself to her performance, not to mention her beautiful, bold, and stellar singing voice. Amy sings about life, and asks and answers her own questions about life. Her song "Exactly", as well as many others have been embraced by the unschooling community for the straight to the heart honesty she shares. My personal favorite, although it's so hard to choose, is "Simplistic Logistics of Existence."

This was my third time seeing Amy live, and I am never disappointed. I attended with another unschooling friend of mine, and I was pleasantly surprised to meet two other unschoolers also in attendance. One woman had driven over two hours to get herself, her hubby, and her daughter to this show! Amy inspires this kind of devotion. Do yourself a favor and make the effort to go see Amy when she comes to your area. She will be doing another cross-country tour this coming year, so there's a good chance you'll be able to enjoy the gift of Amy and her music soon!

Keeping Your "Daily Groove", Even When Holidays Disrupt Your Daily Flow

A Post-Modern Thanksgiving by Scott Noelle, posted on 2006-11-23

Transforming your life experience (including parenting) from a grind to a groove leads to a peculiar realization: It's all GOOD... even the "bad" stuff!

There are hidden blessings in every situation. You may not see some of those blessings for quite some time — perhaps years — but who's to say you can't enjoy them before you know what they are? Don't you enjoy receiving a gift even before you've unwrapped it? :)

So if you're celebrating Thanksgiving today, try giving thanks for things that don't normally garner your gratitude:

Your child's crying, whining, aggression, etc.

The person who judged or criticized your parenting.

That thing you said or did to your child that you promised you never would.

Allow yourself to appreciate that LIFE IS GOOD... all of it! Acknowledge the gift of shadows, without which the Light would have no depth.
Have fun! :)

(Check out Scott's site for more parenting wisdom and inspiration.)

It's really true! Life IS good. When we can see all things that happens as valuable, everything takes on new meaning. The trick is learning to listen to the message that we're getting from life's twists and turns. It takes mindfulness to be able to step back from situations and to examine them for what meaning they have for our life. This requires us to be fully present in the moment, so that we can observe what is really happening, rather than what we "think" is happening.

Being fully present ironically allows us to remove our "selves" from the situation so that we can observe what is happening, rather than just reacting to what is going on. From this vantage point, we can CHOOSE how to view and handle a situation. We can choose to see the light that shines even in the darkest of moments. But first, we have to be looking for it! ;)

Here's to a Thanksgiving that "shines" for all us! Cheers!

Re-creating Myself

(Crocheted and shrink art jewelry by me.)

One of the best things I've discovered, or re-discovered, since having children is my own creativity. I spent so many years working to be "professional" in my field, to be taken seriously as an "adult", and making "work" out of being the best parent I could be. I'm only recently coming to realize that to be my best at any of these things requires me to honor and accept all parts of myself. That especially includes the parts of myself that I tucked away in order to be more "mature" and adult.

The part of me that LOVES arts and crafts, and enjoys appreciating others art and creativity, is making a strong resurgence. This is what brought me joy when I was younger, and it is no less joyful now! Thanks to all the wonderful resources at my fingertips (via the computer), I am able to nurture this part of me and be inspired by countless others. It feels like a whole new world has opened up to me. But in reality, it is re-visiting of a part of myself that has been fallow for some time. Now, I am definitely enjoying the harvest, and looking to further cultivate my joy in creating.

Today's Daily Om spoke so eloquently about this that I wanted to share it. Here's an excerpt:

In certain times and places, developing a creative ability was considered an important part of being a well-rounded human being. It was not necessary to be a professional or a masterly genius, because the act of creativity was valued in and of itself. It gifts are manifold—from the sheer pleasure of allowing our imaginations free reign to sharing and enjoying the fruits of our labor. Children share drawings and songs freely, without self-consciousness, and there is no reason why we cannot do the same thing. (Read the entire piece here.)

This has been so true for me! Why not see if there's a part of you longing to create? You can find instructions for just about anything right here on the Internet. ;) Try something new and you might find something old and familiar inside that's been dieing to get out. Let me know about it too. I'd love to hear about it!

Sabbath

This time of year it is very easy to see nature beginning a Sabbath of sorts. The leaves are falling, some animals are preparing to hibernate, while birds begin their journey south. Many people see the winter as a time of hibernating too! At the same time, with all the fall and winter holidays approaching, it can become a very hectic, sometimes chaotic time for people. I greatly value the lessons I've learned when I am able to be still and quiet, in spite the frenetic pace that modern day living can result in.

One of my very favorite books of all time is Sabbath, by Wayne Muller. The following is one of my favorite passages from this book, although truth be told, it is one of those books in which I seem to have more pages dog-eared for being my favorite, than there are pages left straight.

Sabbath honors the necessary wisdom of dormancy. If certain plant species, for example, do not lie dormant for winter, they will not bear fruit in the spring. If this continues for more than a season, the plant begins to die. If dormancy continues to be prevented, the entire species will die. A period of rest--in which nutrition and fertility most readily coalesce--is not simply human psychological convenience; it is a spiritual and biological necessity. A lack of dormancy produces confusion and erosion in the life force.

We, too, must have a period in which we lie fallow, and restore our souls. In Sabbath time we remember to celebrate what is beautiful and sacred; we light candles, sing songs, tell stories, eat, nap, and make love. It is a time to let our work, our lands, our animals lie fallow, to be nourished and refreshed. Within this sanctuary, we become available to the insights and blessings of deep mindfulness that arise only in stillness and time. When we act from a place of deep rest, we are more capable of cultivating what the Buddhists would call right understanding, right action, and right effort. In a complex and unstable world, if we do not rest, if we do not surrender into some kind of Sabbath, how can we find our way, how can we hear the voices that tell us the right thing to do?

I just loved how this book examined the idea of Sabbath, the rhythm of work and rest, as practiced in many religions and cultures. The author provides ample justification for us all to take the time to just be. He also gives many practical examples of how to incorporate the idea of Sabbath into our everyday lives. Ultimately, he writes, we can be Sabbath for each other. What a beautiful thought. I hope you all find a way to rest and enjoy this wonderful time of year.

The Gratitude Dance

This was on my friend Anne's blog yesterday. She is one of the many wonderful people I am grateful to have in my life. I bet you can't watch the whole thing without smiling!