Mother's Day

This was our first Mother's Day without my husband's mom here. I was missing her so much this week. It is such a bittersweet holiday this year. As sad as I am for not having my mother-in-law and my grandmothers here to celebrate, it makes me even more grateful for my own mother still being a part of my life, and especially grateful to actually be a mother myself. I am frequently awe-struck by the fact that I am blessed with children, and they each are so amazing to me! There is no other gift that could ever possibly bring more joy and meaning to my life than my children have, just by being who they are.

To me, that is what Mother's Day is all about, celebrating the gift of each other. Hope you all had reason to celebrate this year!

Happy Thanksgiving!!!

Gratitude is born in hearts that take time to count up past mercies.
Charles E. Jefferson

I hope you all had a wonderful day full of memories and memory-making that left you stuffed with gratitude! ;)

Thank You Lucy Burns...

...and thank you Alice Paul, and thank you to all the women who so courageously stood up for women and their right to vote. Thank you for enduring the hardship, humiliation, and even brutality, all to secure the right to vote.

The first three generations of women voters in my family ( my grandmother, my mother, and me)

Thank you to my grandmother, Florence (Grant) Ingerson, for telling me that women weren't allowed to vote when you were a child. I could hardly believe it was that way in your lifetime! Thank you for impressing upon me how much the "privilege" of voting meant to you. As I cast my vote in this presidential election, I was filled with gratitude to you and to all the women who came before me that made it possible for me to do so.

I am grateful and joy-filled that I live in a country where my voice counts. I have seen and heard so much dread and fear expressed during this election season. People on all sides are predicting terrible things for the future of our country, if their party doesn't win. I refuse to give in to that type of fear. As long as we continue to use our voices and our vote to participate in our government, we can ensure our country takes the direction we want. As long as we remember that our government really is us, not them, we will thrive.

(I do not like discussing politics, at all! So, lucky for you, this is all you will hear from me about it.)

Removing Labels That Stick

I am reprinting today's whole Daily Om because I can identify so much with what is written. I have been labelled by my family as "slow" - for taking too long for everything, "backwards"- for not warming up to strangers immediately and not being more outgoing. These are only two of the labels that I was "stuck with" growing up, and I spent much of my life trying to prove them wrong.


Fortunately, my children can see the value of who they are, even if others try to throw labels at them. With the knowledge that every moment is new, every moment is an opportunity to change or develope in a new way, I have been very diligent about not labelling my children, not even in my thoughts. I know firsthand how limiting it is to believe that others' labels of you are true. I think part of this also came from my many years of working with children who were given labels by the school system. Once told, I would often forget the labels, literally. In my mind, the only purose those labels served was to allow me to work with these children. The labels told me nothing about who the children were, or how I could be of service to them.


Through the blessing of the children I worked with, and my own children, I have learned to see the positive in so many traits that others would view as negative. This is a gift I have only recently been able to give myself. I no longer fight the "slow" label, but relish the fact that my "slowness" allows me to be more reflective and more appreciative of my life than I would be if I tried to keep up with others. I also know that I have more deeply authentic relationships in my life because I do not allow superficial social interactions to dominate my time. If others believe I am backwards, or have no "social life", so be it. I am happy with my life, and I do not let others' labels to take that away from me.


Just like the saying goes, "Labels are for soup cans." (Sorry, I don't know who said that.)
Don't accept labels from ANYONE, especially loved ones. Discover for yourself the good in what others cannot see. :D


Daily Om

February 6, 2008 Turn It Around

Laboring Under A Label



We live in a culture that uses labels as a means of understanding the world and the people living in it. As a result, many of us find ourselves laboring under a label that has a negative connotation. Unless we can find a way to see the good in such a label, we may feel burdened by an idea of ourselves that is not accurate. It is important to remember that almost nothing in this world is all good or all bad, and most everything is a complex mixture of gifts and challenges. In addition, different cultures revere certain qualities over others, but this does not mean that these qualities are inherently good or bad. For example, a culture that elevates outgoing behavior will label an introvert in a negative way, calling them antisocial. In truth, the ability to spend time alone is one that most great artists, mystics, and visionaries share. Owning the positive side of this label can lead us deeper into our gifted visions and fertile imaginations.


When we look into the lives of any of the great people in history, we always find that they had quirks and eccentricities that earned them less than ideal labels from the societies in which they lived. Many famous artists and musicians were considered to be isolated loners or disruptive troublemakers, or sometimes both, yet these people altered history and contributed to the world an original vision or advances in our understanding of the universe. If we can remember this as we examine our own selves and the labels people use to describe us, we find that there is a bright side to any characterization.

If you have been labeled, remember that all you have to do to see the positive side is to turn the label around. For example, you may be considered to be overly emotional, and the fact that you are perceived this way may make you feel out of control. But notice, too, the gifts of being able to feel and express your emotions, even in a world that doesn’t always encourage that. You might begin to see yourself as brave and open-hearted enough to stay alive to your feelings. You may also see that there are certain paths and professions in which this is a necessary ability. As you turn your label around, the light of your true nature shines to guide you on your way .

For more information visit dailyom.com

Goodbye 2007 and Hello 2008!

The photo above was (as you can see by the stupid date stamp that I keep forgetting to turn off) the final sunset of 2007, as viewed from my front yard. What a beautiful good-bye for the year!

I wish everyone a New Year even more beautiful than the last. I hope that we all keep our eyes open to the beauty of life that surrounds us all, and share our joy to keep the beauty growing. I am confident that we can make this world an even better place than it already is.

You see things; and you say, 'Why?' But I dream things that never were; and I say, "Why not?" -- George Bernard Shaw, "Back to Methuselah" (1921), part 1, act 1

Why I Love Mondays, and My Dear Husband

So many people dread Mondays, that I may seem a little odd for loving them so much. But when Monday is one of your spouse's only days off each week, it becomes something to really look forward to, for many reasons. Since we unschool, my children and I are able to enjoy the whole day on Monday with my husband. Our Mondays tend to be wonderful family days.

A few weeks ago we went to play laser tag together. It is so much fun, and I deplore shooting type games. There is so much laughter and squeals of excitement that I don't think I stop smiling the whole time we play. Plus, it can be a pretty good workout! Because we are able to go on Monday, during the time when most children are at school, we usually get the benefit of having the whole place to ourselves, wherever we go. An added benefit that we found out about last time we played is that Monday is $1.oo day where we went to play, that includes games of laser tag, miniature golf, and bowling - all only $1.oo per game!!! That makes it much easier on our wallets. ;)

Last week, we took advantage of the beautiful weather and went out on my parents' boat to "the sandbar". There are so many boats around here, that they really could use traffic control on the water during sunny weekends. However, when we went out, the seagulls were our only lunch companions. My husband had saved a bag of bread crusts from the last time he made bread pudding (which is sooooooo good!), and it didn't take long for the seagulls to flock around the boat! Here's a few pictures of our day.

(A view looking down the length of the sandbar, a view of how far you can walk out in the shallow water - See my brave 8 year old waaaaay out there, past my daughter? )

So far today, my youngest two went with my husband to help plate meals for a fundraiser and now my husband is helping my oldest son refinish his skateboard ramp. Tonight he will be making us a special dinner of crabmeat and pasta.

My husband may not get much time off from work, but he sure knows how to make the most of it, and any time we have together! That's why I love Mondays, and one of the many reasons I love my dear husband.

Well, I Did It!

Or I guess you could say "I didn't do it." What I DID was avoid going to any stores, or shopping on-line at all today. What I DIDN'T do was buy into the hype about Black Friday shopping. I was tempted, believe me, when I saw some of the deals out there! But I know from experience that my family would rather have ME, than have me out shopping. And in return for staying home today, I received gifts that you can't purchase anywhere. As we swam, read books, played games, performed magic and music, I revelled in the gift of simply being together.

Keeping Your "Daily Groove", Even When Holidays Disrupt Your Daily Flow

A Post-Modern Thanksgiving by Scott Noelle, posted on 2006-11-23

Transforming your life experience (including parenting) from a grind to a groove leads to a peculiar realization: It's all GOOD... even the "bad" stuff!

There are hidden blessings in every situation. You may not see some of those blessings for quite some time — perhaps years — but who's to say you can't enjoy them before you know what they are? Don't you enjoy receiving a gift even before you've unwrapped it? :)

So if you're celebrating Thanksgiving today, try giving thanks for things that don't normally garner your gratitude:

Your child's crying, whining, aggression, etc.

The person who judged or criticized your parenting.

That thing you said or did to your child that you promised you never would.

Allow yourself to appreciate that LIFE IS GOOD... all of it! Acknowledge the gift of shadows, without which the Light would have no depth.
Have fun! :)

(Check out Scott's site for more parenting wisdom and inspiration.)

It's really true! Life IS good. When we can see all things that happens as valuable, everything takes on new meaning. The trick is learning to listen to the message that we're getting from life's twists and turns. It takes mindfulness to be able to step back from situations and to examine them for what meaning they have for our life. This requires us to be fully present in the moment, so that we can observe what is really happening, rather than what we "think" is happening.

Being fully present ironically allows us to remove our "selves" from the situation so that we can observe what is happening, rather than just reacting to what is going on. From this vantage point, we can CHOOSE how to view and handle a situation. We can choose to see the light that shines even in the darkest of moments. But first, we have to be looking for it! ;)

Here's to a Thanksgiving that "shines" for all us! Cheers!

So I Never Forget....(revisited)

This is a post that I wrote almost a year and a half ago. I thought is was appropriate to take another look at it for Thanksgiving. It's great to know that I still have ALL this to be grateful for, and MORE! (I added a few more things in orange italics for this year.)

I hope Thanksgiving finds you with much to be grateful for too. Have a wonderful day tomorrow!

I am so grateful for my life, for being able to use my body to walk and swim and jump and dance and sing and climb stairs and sooooooo much more.

I am grateful for the gift of faith which has carried me through difficult times and given me the courage to change and grow.

I am grateful for my husband, whose devotion to our children matches my own. I am grateful that he is willing to work hard and yet knows how to play. I am grateful for all that he has added to my life, all that I have learned from him, and for the opportunity I have had to be there for him.

I am grateful for my children, without whom I cannot even imagine what I would be doing now.

I am grateful that I am able to live and learn alongside them everyday, and for who I am becoming by being their mother.

I am grateful that my children are alive and healthy today.

I am grateful that I live in my own home, where I feel relatively safe, and I can sleep each night without fear of losing my life or belongings.

I am grateful that all our basic needs are met as a family, so that we are able to share with others.

I am grateful to have friends whom I know I could call in an emergency. ( and for the wonderful community of on-line friends who inspire, encourage, and make me smile daily.)

I am grateful that our family has made it safely through 3 major hurricanes in the last 2 years! (I'm grateful that we're almost done with the hurricane repairs, and that we haven't had to evacuate since I first posted this in July 2006!)

I'm grateful for my past, even the bad stuff, because all of it led me to where I am today.

I am grateful for having worked in the field of occupational therapy. I was fortunate to work with so many amazing people, who showed me that every life is valuable, no matter how compromised it may appear. I am grateful for having worked with Hope, who survived a botched abortion. (I'm grateful that I can be home full-time to live and learn alongside my children.)

I am grateful for the generous unschooling community at large, which helps me in my journey towards being the best parent I can be to my children.

I am grateful that I haven't "arrived" yet. I am glad to still be on a journey, still learning and growing. (Yep, I'm very grateful that I can still say this is true!)

Friday Fill-in #46

1. The things I give thanks for this Thanksgiving are my life, my faith, my family, my friends.

2. My Thanksgiving traditions include my dad cooking the turkey and stuffing, my mom and I each making two side dishes, and my dear husband providing the bread and desserts. We've done it this way for quite a few years, and it allows all of us to share in the preparations, without any one person being overwhelmed by it all. I love it!

3. The best part about Thanksgiving is that we all focus on gratitude in a big way.

4. My favorite Thanksgiving food is pumpkin pie, of course!

5. I can't recall the most embarrassing thing that ever happened to me on Thanksgiving. I must have blocked it out. ;P

6. After the meal, I load this dishwasher, then relax, leaving the rest of the mess for the next day. :D

7. And as for the weekend, tonight I'm looking forward to having the kitchen fully stocked again from food shopping, tomorrow my plans include just enjoying the beautiful weather, and Sunday I want to go shopping for my son's birthday(which just happens to be on Thanksgiving this year).

The Gratitude Dance

This was on my friend Anne's blog yesterday. She is one of the many wonderful people I am grateful to have in my life. I bet you can't watch the whole thing without smiling!